Am I Up Or Am I Down??

So I can't seem to find any consistently lately as we are rapidly entering that most critical period in the training for the marathon races (see previous post about wanting a rock) where I should have a solid base and now more or less be fine tuning. One day I feel like Lance Armstrong toying with the competition up a hill, the next I feel like the fat kid in 7th grade trying bunny hop a huffy over plywood ramps.

Case in point: This past weekend was the Ouachita Challenge training camp (mad props to the Henne's for hosting and the CARVE team for organizing). I rolled out with a fast crew for sure, but given my goals this year of being a mid-pack CAT 1 and doing very well in the marathon series, I should definitely be rolling easily with this bunch. They didn't drop me or anything, but after climbing only Chalybeate Mtn then half of Blowout Mtn, I was cooked. I kept riding with the group, but there was no giddy-up in my horse. After we crossed Big Brushy, Penrod & Wes mercifully claimed they were cooked as well and we bailed. Good for me. I honestly didn't feel capable of completing the whole OC course that day. Maybe the snow and cold played a part, probably did, but I just felt like I should have had more endurance at this point in the season. I was actually sore on Sunday. Sore! Jeeze, shouldn't I be beyond that?

Then tonight on the Tuesday night hammer-fest, I rocked. Not to brag, but it was true. I won a difficult uphill sprint through Burns Park over people that have dropped me recently there, then I pulled the rest of the way to the Big Dam Bridge dropping several folks and splitting our little mini-peloton in two. After a brief re-group, we finished out the ride by heading the usual way over the bridge, back to Little Rock, then the grand finale hammerfest up the long Kavanaugh hill into The Heights. I hung with 2 other guys and we gapped everyone else by several hundred yards. And believe it or not, I still had plenty of legs left. And all this only 3 days after being the fat kid at training camp.

So which am I? Am I the fat kid on the Huffy or am I legitimately getting in "CAT 1 shape"? I know that if I made my routine, diet, warm-up etc more repeatable I'd probably get more repeatable results. But my routine doesn't really vary that much. My friend Sarah suggested last week I get a coach. She has a really good one that has yielded good results and she says he's not that expensive. But I just don't think I can be regimented enough with my training to make that worthwhile. Between traveling for work and spending time with my kids I'm just not willing to make it a high enough priority. So maybe there's my answer right there. I am where I am because I'm at the limit of what I'm willing to sacrifice. Part of me is ok with that. Part of me is not because I know I'm really close to making rides like tonight my routine. Oh, and I really want that rock. Can I have my cake and eat it too? Pretty please?

I just rambled.